Survival of the fittest or ????

I am staring at the watch as I type. With two exams down and one due tomorrow, we have almost finished the end term. You would ask why this sudden urgency to write now when my last post was more than 3 weeks. why cant I wait for tomorrow to be able to write quality and not just spew a mixture of thoughts on the screen and stop torturing my readers with half baked ideas and stories. As I walked out of the paper and comtemplated how I had done, my first thought was how others had done. Game theory the call it right. Life has become that only. Everything is ranked basis the average. What was the average, am I above, it, if yes, how much above, if below, how much below. All grades are relative. So the fight to survive, to be the best. If someone were to come and tell me people found the paper tough, that would give me more pleasure than the fact that I did a good paper. Its sad. You wish everyone but your close friends have ----ed it. You wish mediocrity on others to ensure you come out as better. Its all relative. Makes me miss college and school, where everyone was happy that everyone scored. Are the resources that short that we need to apportion. the production frontier, have we reached that? Adn then again, why do we all want the same things, which are not enough in number. are we all runnning after a mirage and losing our identities in the process. Would one grade more or less matter any which way in the future, or for that matter, even today. Are grades any measure of intelligence or competence in any case. Its convenient to decide the world in above and below average, but is it right. Does it make any sense whatsoever.
:)
Contemplatingly yours

Wide AWAKE

0630 in the morning. Cant believe I was awake the whole night finishing an assignment, and I am still not sleepy. This inspite of living on 4-5 hours of sleep for the past 3 days, due to a mid term exam. Strange. Life changes, people change, even habits change. I would never have thought I could survive on anything less than 8 hours of sleep. Sleep, such a precious commodity at ISB. U want to do so much more, that sleep feels like a waste of time. Actually.
Term 3 is the killer, I had heard from seniors. It feels very much true. What with assignments every 2 days, bidding for live industry projects, and so many other things coming up, it actually is difficult to survivie. Sometimes I wonder what world I am living in, what life and whats beyond this. And what was before this. I miss my past life a lot here, like I will ISB a lot when I pass out.
What more and what less and what else and what not...:)

Wonderingly yours